Where am I and who am I?

Lost again. I came to this blog to find out who I am. But it is not helpful. I still don't know who I am. I must be a conscious entity. With some attributes.

But now who am I? I am right now covered. Shrouded in some kind of black cloud of ignorance. Ignorant of my real identity, or my real location. Even somewhat asleep and groggy.

When will I wake up? When will the truth become something that is forever with me, that I don't have to wonder about?

All I want is to be able to get more and more realizations. To feel truly alive again. But my old habits, and old attachments are blocking me. My preconceived notions are becoming the barricades in my progress. How to deal with this?

And now, when I need guidance, there is nothing really that can help me. All the help is invisible to me. I can't see it or take it. As days pass by with little gandharvas causing the illusion of solar time, I feel as though I am quickly approaching a terrible situation of permanent sorrow. A place where I will be put through difficult examinations, all of which I am about to fail in. I am so unprepared.

My recurring dream of not being prepared for my examination is indicating this to me. Although aware, I don't know what I should do to be more prepared.

This is what defines totally lost.

And so I sojourn here
Alone and palely loitering,
Though the sedge is withered from the lake,
And no birds sing.